ONE DAY AT A TIME.
God Bless,
Em
Monday, July 2, 2012
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Bittersweet Happenings
In the previous post I have every intention to blog more frequently until life happened and hit me like an avalanche that wont stop rolling.
I lost my grandfather (on my dads side) in March of this year and it was a complete blow to our family. We ALL struggled with his loss tremendously as he was not just a grandparent to us, he was a HUGE part in our upbringing. I mourned his loss everyday trying to make sense of what was happening around me when the rug got completely ripped out from our feet once again .. a month to the day after my grandfather passed.
Cancer. NO ONE EVER wants to hear that word. Peoples knees shudder at the sound of that word and a dark cloud of fear hangs over it, constantly. We learned that my daddy has cancer in his liver and also in a lymph node just outside of his stomach. I have never in my life felt the pain I felt that day he walked in sobbing telling my mom, sister and I that he had cancer. Never have I ever gained such a hate for something in such a short amount of time. You are not supposed to lose your dad at 26. Period.
It is now July 1st and we have gone through one TACE procedure and about 2 weeks of oral chemo. He will be starting radiation and undergoing another TACE procedure in efforts to shrink the tumor on his liver and to kill the cancer cells in his lymph node. I feel like I have taken all this like a champ, as good as I can take it. I am strong for him, hardly letting him see or hear my cry, but just emotional enough so that he knows I care. There is just something about seeing your dad pounds lighter and so exhausted all the time that breaks my heart into a million pieces over and over.
All of my friends have been amazing throughout this entire terrible journey and continue to be wonderful to me but I feel I need another emotional outlet. I will use this blog as a way to write out my feelings, any new updates, etc. I will NOT use CaringBridge because I can not mentally handle writing on that website ... it's so official.
In the midst of all of this, I have to raise my child and I struggle everyday with doing that the way I want to in such a terrible time for our family. I fight back tears everyday knowing that it is likely that my dad will not see him graduate high school or watch him play middle school football. I love him so much and it kills me to not be able to give him 100% when I feel like crawling in the bed and hiding from life. But HE is my reason for pushing on and HE is my dads reason for fighting this thing. So we will continue to move forward and do what we do. Just in a bittersweet kind of way.
I don't know how many people will read this nor do I care. The goal of this is to keep my feelings in check (as much as I can) and to keep those who care updated. For those of you who have gone through similar situations and feel like you have words of encouragement to contribute or anything to lift spirits, just know that WE NEED THAT. Please feel free to email me emgriff1120@yahoo.com with any advice or encouragement.
God Bless.
I lost my grandfather (on my dads side) in March of this year and it was a complete blow to our family. We ALL struggled with his loss tremendously as he was not just a grandparent to us, he was a HUGE part in our upbringing. I mourned his loss everyday trying to make sense of what was happening around me when the rug got completely ripped out from our feet once again .. a month to the day after my grandfather passed.
Cancer. NO ONE EVER wants to hear that word. Peoples knees shudder at the sound of that word and a dark cloud of fear hangs over it, constantly. We learned that my daddy has cancer in his liver and also in a lymph node just outside of his stomach. I have never in my life felt the pain I felt that day he walked in sobbing telling my mom, sister and I that he had cancer. Never have I ever gained such a hate for something in such a short amount of time. You are not supposed to lose your dad at 26. Period.
It is now July 1st and we have gone through one TACE procedure and about 2 weeks of oral chemo. He will be starting radiation and undergoing another TACE procedure in efforts to shrink the tumor on his liver and to kill the cancer cells in his lymph node. I feel like I have taken all this like a champ, as good as I can take it. I am strong for him, hardly letting him see or hear my cry, but just emotional enough so that he knows I care. There is just something about seeing your dad pounds lighter and so exhausted all the time that breaks my heart into a million pieces over and over.
All of my friends have been amazing throughout this entire terrible journey and continue to be wonderful to me but I feel I need another emotional outlet. I will use this blog as a way to write out my feelings, any new updates, etc. I will NOT use CaringBridge because I can not mentally handle writing on that website ... it's so official.
In the midst of all of this, I have to raise my child and I struggle everyday with doing that the way I want to in such a terrible time for our family. I fight back tears everyday knowing that it is likely that my dad will not see him graduate high school or watch him play middle school football. I love him so much and it kills me to not be able to give him 100% when I feel like crawling in the bed and hiding from life. But HE is my reason for pushing on and HE is my dads reason for fighting this thing. So we will continue to move forward and do what we do. Just in a bittersweet kind of way.
I don't know how many people will read this nor do I care. The goal of this is to keep my feelings in check (as much as I can) and to keep those who care updated. For those of you who have gone through similar situations and feel like you have words of encouragement to contribute or anything to lift spirits, just know that WE NEED THAT. Please feel free to email me emgriff1120@yahoo.com with any advice or encouragement.
God Bless.
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Been a while ..
Since my last post .. there has been SO much going on.
We have moved into our new house, a special little boy turned five years old, Halloween and Thanksgiving have come and gone, Pinterest has been a staple in decorating my new house, and THIS girl is getting all A's in school! Whoop whoop!
I have SO many pictures I plan on posting and posts I want to write but I will say this NOW .. I want to be able to look back on all my memories so I WILL continue to post as regularly as possible.
We have moved into our new house, a special little boy turned five years old, Halloween and Thanksgiving have come and gone, Pinterest has been a staple in decorating my new house, and THIS girl is getting all A's in school! Whoop whoop!
I have SO many pictures I plan on posting and posts I want to write but I will say this NOW .. I want to be able to look back on all my memories so I WILL continue to post as regularly as possible.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Our NEW home :)
/Closing on 9/30!
Totally been a WILD ride with school full time, work full time, Coleman starting school and having homework, trying to get our rental house cleaned to get our deposit back, going on a weeks vacation, my cousin getting married, my grandmother breaking her hip ... the list goes ON and ON...
All I can say is we got it for 75k .. YES .. I said SEVENTY FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS .. 2052 square feet .. 2 car garage .. 3 bedrooms .. 2 bathrooms .. boat garage in the FINISHED basement .. bonus room .. on a whole acre of nothing but YARD!!!!
We are SO excited :)
More pics to come ..
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Heavy Heart
I have SUCH a heavy heart today.
One year ago today a friend of mine lost her sweet baby boy. I have thought about them all day long. I really can not believe it has been one year already. Looking back so much has changed. Her baby girl is growing and she is expecting a new little addition soon.
Please pray for God to give them strength to get through this day and to help heal their wounded hearts. Pray for their health and Macy's health. Pray for a strong healthy pregnancy. Pray.
Rest In Peace Tripp.
One year ago today a friend of mine lost her sweet baby boy. I have thought about them all day long. I really can not believe it has been one year already. Looking back so much has changed. Her baby girl is growing and she is expecting a new little addition soon.
Please pray for God to give them strength to get through this day and to help heal their wounded hearts. Pray for their health and Macy's health. Pray for a strong healthy pregnancy. Pray.
Rest In Peace Tripp.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
St. Simons - Part one
Aaron and I decided to take a long week trip down to visit his best friend who lives on St. Simons. We left after Colemans baseball game on Thursday night and got there about 12:30am. It was, what felt like, a never ending drive! We had alot of fun, but I will admit, 3 days at the beach with your best friend who has a passion for fishing as big as he does and your girlfriend who was just beside herself to be at the beach and had SO much she wanted to do, was kind of a struggle.
I have also started classes at Brenau University and had some school work to do while I was there which was totally awful but I got it done! Priorities people!!
Friday we woke up, got breakfast at ChickFila, went to CVS to buy a beach chair and sunscreen, and took our food to the beach to eat. It was SO peaceful and the weather was awesome. We went fishing for a little while and then went and ate a Brogans in the village by the pier .. where I managed to sling ketchup across to the table next to us onto a sweet old lady's nice green linen jacket. Of course I told her .. but after we had a few good laughs .. boy was I embarassed! We ended up going out on a friend of theirs boat (JOHN BOAT) and we were headed to Sea Islands private beach which is probably about a 8 minute boat ride with good weather. HOWEVER .. about 5 minutes into it, it looked like a scene from the Perfect Storm and I can say that I was honestly terrified. There is just something to say about looking out ahead of you and seeing NO land .. water splashing you in the face and getting you soaked .. waves almost so big they are coming into the boat .. it was not a pretty sight. We turned around, went another way, and finally made it. Fished for a little while until a storm started rolling in and then we headed back. We had a pretty laid back night bc we were still so tired from driving the night before.
Saturday we went out for breakfast again and then went fishing in the same morning spot. Then we went to Barbara Jeans for lunch .. THE BEST CRAB CAKES AROUND! It was YUMMY! By the time we ate it was pouring rain outside and FREEZING cold. But with my sweet tooth, we had to run across the street to the Sweet Shop and get some old school candy and some chocolate covered oreos and nutter butters. We got back to the house and they boys went fishing at some very private lake where they racked up on some huge fish! Of course, I was shopping during all of that. I was already asleep by the time they got home, so they called it a night.
Sunday his friend went fishing a couple miles off shore so we said our goodbyes Sunday morning. Aaron and I went to the beach and waded in the water! It was actually warmer in the water than out! We found 5 .. count them FIVE .. sand dollars. My favorite part of going to the beach is sitting in the water about shin deep and finding cool shells or looking for sand dollars. Never in my life have I found FIVE! We stayed out there for about 2.5 hours and then headed back. We took showers and started to pack. So bittersweet leaving bc I LOVE the beach but I missed Coleman SO bad I could not stand it! NEVER again will I leave him for more than one night. I just cant do it.
Post with pics to come ...
I have also started classes at Brenau University and had some school work to do while I was there which was totally awful but I got it done! Priorities people!!
Friday we woke up, got breakfast at ChickFila, went to CVS to buy a beach chair and sunscreen, and took our food to the beach to eat. It was SO peaceful and the weather was awesome. We went fishing for a little while and then went and ate a Brogans in the village by the pier .. where I managed to sling ketchup across to the table next to us onto a sweet old lady's nice green linen jacket. Of course I told her .. but after we had a few good laughs .. boy was I embarassed! We ended up going out on a friend of theirs boat (JOHN BOAT) and we were headed to Sea Islands private beach which is probably about a 8 minute boat ride with good weather. HOWEVER .. about 5 minutes into it, it looked like a scene from the Perfect Storm and I can say that I was honestly terrified. There is just something to say about looking out ahead of you and seeing NO land .. water splashing you in the face and getting you soaked .. waves almost so big they are coming into the boat .. it was not a pretty sight. We turned around, went another way, and finally made it. Fished for a little while until a storm started rolling in and then we headed back. We had a pretty laid back night bc we were still so tired from driving the night before.
Saturday we went out for breakfast again and then went fishing in the same morning spot. Then we went to Barbara Jeans for lunch .. THE BEST CRAB CAKES AROUND! It was YUMMY! By the time we ate it was pouring rain outside and FREEZING cold. But with my sweet tooth, we had to run across the street to the Sweet Shop and get some old school candy and some chocolate covered oreos and nutter butters. We got back to the house and they boys went fishing at some very private lake where they racked up on some huge fish! Of course, I was shopping during all of that. I was already asleep by the time they got home, so they called it a night.
Sunday his friend went fishing a couple miles off shore so we said our goodbyes Sunday morning. Aaron and I went to the beach and waded in the water! It was actually warmer in the water than out! We found 5 .. count them FIVE .. sand dollars. My favorite part of going to the beach is sitting in the water about shin deep and finding cool shells or looking for sand dollars. Never in my life have I found FIVE! We stayed out there for about 2.5 hours and then headed back. We took showers and started to pack. So bittersweet leaving bc I LOVE the beach but I missed Coleman SO bad I could not stand it! NEVER again will I leave him for more than one night. I just cant do it.
Post with pics to come ...
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
West Jackson Royals - Spring T-Ball 2011
Coleman is in the back row 4th from the left :)
Such a little slugger.
This has got to the the most fun I have had in a LONG time! Watching his team play ball is absolutely hilarious! They are SO stinkin cute!!
Hopefully we will get the grasp of the game soon :)
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